I just finished reading one of those trashy magazines that we all know are stupid but we read them anyway. One of the articles I came across was "can you catch an eating disorder-the dangers of disordered eating". The next four pages were all about how to lost weight by eating less and suggesting exercises. The next page after that was a photoshopped picture of a girl who was (I'm just going to say it, it's too early in the morning for tact) fat. Really fat. The headline? "I love my curves". Nice way to send three different messages in the space of four pages. 1. Eat, otherwise you'll get an eating disorder. 2. Don't eat, and do these exercises to lose some weight. 3. It's ok to be obese.
Clear as mud.

On another note, I ate and ate this weekend. Because I chose to. I don't regret this, sometimes you just have to get it all out of your system. So that is what I did. I ate everything I knew I would crave in one go, so now this leaves me with a completely clean slate.

I downloaded an app onto my iPod called "shape up" yesterday, and it has since become my new best friend. It calculates how many calories you need to eat per day to get to your goal weight. It has graphs and food logs and pretty much everything. I love it :)

I'm beginning to write out everything I'll eat for the day in the morning, that way I don't end up having all these little snacksies. I'd better be off, otherwise I'll be late to classes.

Smile :)
You all deserve to.

Xx. Lillie

Vicious Cycles can go to Hell.

I was doing perfectly fine today.

Until my English teacher had a 'surprise' for the class.

Chocolate Cake.

Just when i was beginning to enjoy the emptiness.

It's time to pick myself up and start again i suppose.

I've written out a list of rules.

I'm going to stick to them.

I know i can do this.

And this time, this time it's going to last.

This blog has become an endless series of 'new beginnings', of countless promises to succeed, to myself, and to all of you.

It has to stop.

Now.

Perfection is about to become my reality.

Let it be yours too.

Xx. Lillie