Fading Away

Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum.
Hmph.

Now that that's out of the way...
I'm starting again. again.

Yesterday is now in the past, and there's nothing i can do to change it now, so im doing the next best thing.
Starting again.

Ever had one of those days where you just wish you could do it all over again?
Well, one of those days was yesterday. But lets move on, shall we?

My ballet timetable has increased to almost every day of the week for the next three weeks (performances, performances)
Which will keep me busy i suppose.
It always seems that my school finds the most inappropriate times to give us new assignments.
I have the usual amount of homework while ballet is normal, but once performances start poking their heads around the corner, i have to be a ever-energetic superhero to get through the workload. Oh well, I'll find a way, i usually do :)

Now where was i?
Oh yes, starting again.
I think my problem is that i get lonely quite easily.
I'm not really into hanging out with friends every second of every day, i tried that for one weekend, and turned into a cross between King Kong and Mr Annoyed, meaning well but just getting irritated instead.
When i have the house to myself, sometimes i love it, but sometimes i wish i had a second me to talk to.
Someone who knew everything that i knew about me, and everything else.
Instead, i decide to act like a normal person.
What would a normal person do, i ask myself.
Eat. Most of my friends eat. A lot. Most of the time. That's just the way they are.

Except one, who i know has an eating disorder, but not EDNOS, or anorexia, or bulimia.
What's that, you say?
There's another?
Well, technically its not yet actually classified as an eating disorder, but I'm pretty sure it will be soon enough.
It's called Orthorexia. It's where a person is obsessed with eating healthy. My friend has always been a health nut. But since high school she's become vegetarian, then vegan, and now barely eats anything other than rice crackers, ryvitas, fruit and vegetables. And is thoroughly obsessed with exercise. Sometimes i wish i was like her, always always able to say no to the crap other people eat. I would like to think that she is not always like that, that she slips up and stuffs her face with junk, but she doesn't.

Oh well, in a way it helps, because when i am with her i can never bring myself to eat.

Anyway, this post is long enough already.
And i have two english essays and a history assignment to finish...
BUT, I'm starting again, and this time, it's going to last.
I'm not sure why, but i know that it will.

Stay Strong, Live Life, and don't be afraid to let go of the past and make a fresh start.
Love you all, and your wonderful comments, oh, and before i forget, i know i don't comment much, but im gonna make an effort, so expect to hear from me on your own blogs in the near future. :)
Xx. Lillie (the begin againerer)